China Toughens Restrictions on Internet Use

How Hwee Young/European Pressphoto Agency

New measures by the Chinese government could chill some of the vibrant discourse on Twitter-like microblogs.

HONG KONG — The Chinese government issued new rules on Friday requiring Internet users to provide their real names to service providers, while assigning Internet companies greater responsibility for deleting forbidden postings and reporting them to the authorities.

The decision came as government censors have sharply stepped up restrictions on China’s international Internet traffic in recent weeks. The restrictions are making it harder for businesses to protect commercial secrets and for individuals to view overseas Web sites that the Chinese Communist Party deems politically sensitive.

The new regulations, issued by the Standing Committee of the National People’s Congress, allow Internet users to continue to adopt pseudonyms for their online postings, but only if they first provide their real names to service providers, a measure that could chill some of the vibrant discourse on the country’s Twitter-like microblogs. The authorities periodically detain and even jail Internet users for politically sensitive comments, such as calls for a multiparty democracy or accusations of impropriety by local officials.

Any entity providing Internet access, including over fixed-line or mobile phones, “should when signing agreements with users or confirming provision of services, demand that users provide true information about their identities,” the committee ordered.

In recent weeks, Internet users in China have exposed a series of sexual and financial scandals that have led to the resignations or dismissals of at least 10 local officials. International news media have also published a series of reports in recent months on the accumulation of wealth by the family members of China’s leaders, and some Web sites carrying such reports, including Bloomberg’s and the English- and Chinese-language sites of The New York Times, have been assiduously blocked, while Internet comments about them have been swiftly deleted.

The regulations issued Friday build on a series of similar administrative guidelines and municipal rules issued over the past year. China’s mostly private Internet service providers have been slow to comply with them, fearing the reactions of their customers. The committee’s decision has much greater legal force, and puts far more pressure on Chinese Internet providers to comply more quickly and more comprehensively, Internet specialists said.

In what appeared to be an effort to make the decision more palatable to the Chinese public, the committee also included a mandate for businesses in China to be more cautious in gathering and protecting electronic data.

“Nowadays on the Internet there are very serious problems with citizens’ personal electronic information being recklessly collected, used without approval, illegally disclosed, and even traded and sold,” Li Fei, a deputy director of the committee’s legislative affairs panel, said on Friday at a news conference in Beijing. “There are also a large number of cases of invasive attacks on information systems to steal personal electronic information, as well as lawbreaking on the Internet through swindles and through defaming and slandering others.”

Mr. Li denied that the government was seeking to prevent the exposure of corruption.

“When citizens exercise these rights according to the law, no organization or individual can use any reason or excuse to interfere, and cannot suppress them or exact revenge,” he said. “At the same time, when citizens exercise their rights, including through use of the Internet, they should stay within the bounds of the Constitution and the laws, and must not harm the legitimate rights and interests of the state, society, the collective or of other citizens.”

A spokesman for the National People’s Congress said that 145 members of the committee voted in favor of the new rules, with 5 abstaining and 1 voting against them.

The requirement for real names appeared to be aimed particularly at cellphone companies and other providers of mobile Internet access. At the news conference, an official from the Ministry of Industry and Information Technology, Zhao Zhiguo, said that nearly all fixed-line services now had real-name registration, but that only about 70 percent of mobile phones were registered under real names.

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Retired Gen. H. Norman Schwarzkopf dies at 78

Gen. H. Norman Schwarzkopf, who presided over the swift and devastating 1991 military assault on Iraq that transformed the Middle East and reminded America what it was like to win a war, died Thursday of complications from pneumonia. He was 78.

The former four-star general, whose burly image towering in camouflage fatigues above his troops came to define both Operation Desert Storm and the nation's renewed sense of military pride, had been living in relatively quiet retirement in Tampa, Fla., eschewing the political battles that continued to broil over a part of the world he had left as a conqueror.

"We've lost an American original," the White House said in a statement. "Gen. Schwarzkopf stood tall for the country and Army he loved. Our prayers are with the Schwarzkopf family, who tonight can know that his legacy will endure in a nation that is more secure because of his patriotic service."

Former President George H.W. Bush, hospitalized himself with an illness in Texas, called Schwarzkopf "a true American patriot and one of the great military leaders of his generation."

Schwarzkopf, often called "Stormin' Norman" for his legendary temper, was best known for commanding a 765,000-strong force of allied international troops that drove former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein's forces out of Kuwait six months after they'd overrun the tiny Gulf oil sheikdom, terrorized its citizens and taken over its oil fields.

It was an operation fraught with peril: Iraq had the fourth-largest Army in the world; it was equipped with a large arsenal of Soviet-supplied weaponry; it had dispatched its elite Republican Guard forces into key defensive positions; and the Iraqi president warned he had fortified the borders with moats of oil that could be set afire and turned into deathtraps for any U.S. forces that dared to venture across.

But Schwarzkopf, with an eerie degree of prescience, had rehearsed a battle with Iraq only days before the country's August 1990 invasion of Kuwait and began putting it into place, convincing the leadership in Washington that the war could be won with a combination of forceful American air power and an overwhelming array of troops on the ground.

In the end, after weeks of pounding by American bombers and missiles, the ground war was over in just 100 hours, with U.S. battle casualties limited to 147 dead and 467 wounded.

On the decision of then-President Bush and Army Gen. Colin L. Powell, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Schwarzkopf agreed to end the war short of demolishing the Republican Guard and taking down Saddam Hussein — a decision that would dog him for the rest of his life, especially as the U.S. went to war once again against Iraq in 2003.

To the end, Schwarzkopf insisted he had accepted the decision as the right one, even if he had not embraced it with enthusiasm — continuing to inflict carnage on retreating Iraqi forces for another day would have done little to upset the balance of power in the region and might have risked more American casualties, he said.

Likewise, he rejected criticism that the halt in combat had pulled the rug from underneath nascent rebellions by Iraqi Shiites in the south and Kurds in the north, leaving them vulnerable and exposed to slaughter once U.S. forces went home.

The Kurds had been battling the Iraqi regime for years, and would continue to do so, he said. "Yes, we are disappointed that that has happened. But it does not affect the accomplishment of our mission one way or another," he said at a news conference after the war.

The 6-foot, 3-inch general came home to a hero's welcome, appearing at a ticker-tape parade up Broadway, the Pegasus Parade at the Kentucky Derby in Louisville and an unusual joint session of Congress, where he received a standing ovation. Britain's Queen Elizabeth II awarded him a knighthood.

"In the defeat of Saddam's forces, he vanquished the scars on the American psyche over Vietnam," said Frank Wuco, a former senior naval intelligence officer who helped draft battle plans during Desert Storm. "He showed the Americans, primarily the American military, what victory felt like again."

In a 1992 autobiography written with Peter Petre, Schwarzkopf downplayed the notion of personal valor and resurrected something he'd said earlier to journalist Barbara Walters: "It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle."

Schwarzkopf was born Aug. 22, 1934, in Trenton, N.J. By graduating from the West Point military academy in 1956, he followed in the footsteps of his father, a general who served in both world wars and went on to found the New Jersey State Police, which investigated the kidnapping of the infant son of famed aviator Charles Lindbergh.

Schwarzkopf went on to earn a master's degree in engineering from USC and taught missile engineering at West Point before volunteering in 1966 to serve in Vietnam — a conflict he called a "cesspool," in which he said military commanders were more interested in promoting their careers than in winning the war.

But Schwarzkopf went on to earn kudos from his own troops, at one point landing by helicopter in a minefield to rescue men trapped there. He was wounded twice and won three Silver Stars for bravery.

He commanded ground troops in the invasion of Grenada in 1983 and in 1988 took over U.S. Central Command, overseeing a staff of 700 at MacDill Air Force Base near Tampa. There, he quickly discarded the old playbooks that said the Soviet Union was the biggest threat to American interests in the Middle East. He turned his sights instead on Iraq.

Headquartered in the Saudi capital of Riyadh during the buildup to Desert Storm, Schwarzkopf had a double-barreled shotgun in the corner, and in his spare living quarters, a Bible and an edition of World War II German Field Marshal Erwin Rommel's "Infantry Attack."

He often said he wished for more patience but sometimes bristled at the notion he had a bad temper.

"An awful lot has been written about my temper. But I would defy anyone to go back over the years and tell me anyone whose career I've ruined, anyone whom I've driven out of the service, anyone I've fired from a job," he said. "I don't do that. I get angry at a principle, not a person."

He is survived by his wife, Brenda; two daughters, Cynthia and Jessica; a son, Christian; a grandson; and sisters Ruth Barenbaum and Sally Schwarzkopf.

kim.murphy@latimes.com

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Leaked BlackBerry 10 slides show video calling and screen sharing for BBM

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Stallone did not copy screenplay for “The Expendables”: judge

NEW YORK (Reuters) – A federal judge has reaffirmed his decision to dismiss a lawsuit accusing actor Sylvester Stallone of copying someone else’s screenplay to make his popular 2010 movie “The Expendables.”

U.S. District Judge Jed Rakoff in Manhattan on Thursday rejected claims of copyright infringement damages by Marcus Webb, who contended that the movie’s screenplay contained 20 “striking similarities” to his own “The Cordoba Caper.”

Webb claimed that both works had similar plots, and involved hired mercenaries in a Latin American country that was home to a villain dictator named General Garza.

But Rakoff said no reasonable juror could find that the works were so similar as to eliminate the possibility that Stallone crafted his screenplay on his own.

Not even the general’s name was an automatic red flag, Rakoff said, writing that “Garza” was the 34th most common Hispanic nickname in the United States.

“The court has carefully examined the entire litany of plaintiff’s proffered ‘striking similarities’ and finds none of them remotely striking or legally sufficient,” Rakoff wrote. “These are two very different screenplays built on a familiar theme: mercenaries taking on a Latin American dictator.”

Other defendants in the case included Nu Image Films, which produced the movie, and Lions Gate Entertainment Corp, which distributed the movie in the United States.

Lawyers for Webb did not immediately respond to requests for comment.

“The Expendables” was released in August 2010, and featured other older action stars like Jet Li and Arnold Schwarzenegger. A sequel, “The Expendables 2,” was released in August 2012.

In June, Rakoff decided to dismiss Webb’s case [ID:nL2E8HQA93] but did not provide his reasons until Thursday.

Stallone also starred in the “Rocky” and “Rambo” movies.

The case is Webb v. Stallone et al, U.S. District Court, Southern District of New York, No. 11-07517.

(Reporting by Jonathan Stempel; Editing by Jan Paschal)

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Recipes for Health: Spinach, Sardine and Rice Gratin

Andrew Scrivani for The New York Times

Spinach, sardine and rice gratin.

Sometimes a can of sardines comes in very handy and this dish is a great way to work more high-omega 3 fish into your diet. It is a classic Provençal gratin, traditionally made with fresh sardines but just as good made with the skinless, boneless olive-oil packed sardines I buy at Trader Joe’s. You are getting lots of calcium, Omega-3 fatty acids and iron from both the sardines and the spinach.

 

2 3.75-ounce cans boneless, skinless and boneless sardines packed in olive oil

2 pounds spinach (2 generous bunches), stemmed and washed in two changes of water or 1 pound baby spinach

1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

1 medium onion, finely chopped

2 to 4 garlic cloves, minced

1 teaspoon fresh thyme leaves, roughly chopped, or 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme

1 teaspoon all-purpose flour

1/2 cup low-fat milk

1 cup cooked rice (brown or white; I like to use Arborio)

1/4 cup fresh or dry bread crumbs

 

1. Preheat the oven to 425 degrees. Oil a 1 1/2 to 2-quart gratin or baking dish. Remove the sardines from the oil and separate them into fillets. Set the oil aside.

2. Wilt the spinach either by steaming or blanching. To blanch bring a large pot of water to a boil, salt generously and add the spinach. Blanch for no more than 20 seconds (do this in batches). Transfer to a bowl of cold water, drain and squeeze out excess water. If you prefer, you can wilt the spinach by steaming for about 1 minute over an inch of boiling water. Chop medium-fine.

3. Heat the olive oil (not the oil from the sardines) in the skillet over medium heat and add the onion and a pinch of salt. Cook, stirring, until tender, 5 to 8 minutes. Add a generous pinch of salt, stir in the garlic and thyme and cook, stirring, until fragrant, 30 seconds to a minute, then add the chopped wilted spinach, flour, and salt and pepper to taste. Stir together for 1 minute, until everything is blended. Add the milk and cooked rice and stir together for about 1 minute, until you no longer see liquid in the pan. Remove from the heat. Taste and adjust salt and pepper.

4. Spread half the rice and spinach in the bottom of the baking dish. Top with the sardine fillets in one layer. Drizzle a tablespoon of the oil from the cans over the sardines, then top with the remaining rice and spinach in an even layer. Sprinkle on the breadcrumbs and drizzle on another tablespoon of the oil from the sardine cans. Place in the oven and bake 15 minutes, until sizzling. Serve hot or warm.

 

Yield: Serves 4

Advance preparation: You can assemble this up to a day ahead of baking. Do not top with the breadcrumbs and oil until just before baking. Keep well covered in the refrigerator. Leftovers will keep for a few days in the refrigerator. Reheat in a moderate oven.

Nutritional information per serving: 265 calories; 11 grams fat; 2 grams saturated fat; 1 gram polyunsaturated fat; 3 grams monounsaturated fat; 10 milligrams cholesterol; 22 grams carbohydrates; 4 grams dietary fiber; 271 milligrams sodium (does not include salt to taste); 20 grams protein

 

Martha Rose Shulman is the author of “The Very Best of Recipes for Health.”

 

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Toyota to pay big to settle suits

Toyota Motor Corp., moving to put years of legal problems behind it, has agreed to pay more than $1 billion to settle dozens of lawsuits relating to sudden acceleration.

The proposed deal, filed Wednesday in federal court, would be among the largest ever paid out by an automaker. It applies to numerous suits claiming economic damages caused by safety defects in the automaker's vehicles, but does not cover dozens of personal injury and wrongful-death suits that are still pending around the nation.

The suits were filed over the last three years by Toyota and Lexus owners who claimed that the value of their vehicles had been hurt by the potential for defects, including floor mats that could cause the vehicles to surge out of control.

ROAD TO RECALL: Read The Times' award winning coverage

In addition, Toyota said it is close to settling suits filed by the Orange County district attorney and a coalition of state attorneys general who had accused the automaker of deceptive business practices. The costs of those agreements would be included in a $1.1-billion charge the Japanese automaker said it will take against earnings to cover the actions.

"We concluded that turning the page on this legacy legal issue through the positive steps we are taking is in the best interests of the company, our employees, our dealers and, most of all, our customers," Christopher Reynolds, Toyota's chief counsel in the U.S., said in a statement.

Toyota's lengthy history of sudden acceleration was the subject of a series of Los Angeles Times articles in 2009, after a horrific crash outside San Diego that took the life of an off-duty California Highway Patrol officer and his family.

Under terms of the agreement, which has not yet been approved in court, Toyota would install brake override systems in numerous models and provide cash payments from a $250-million fund to owners whose vehicles cannot be modified to incorporate that safety measure.

In addition, the automaker plans to offer extended repair coverage on throttle systems in 16 million vehicles and offer cash payments from a separate $250-million fund to Toyota and Lexus owners who sold their vehicles or turned them in at the end of a lease in 2009 or 2010. The total value of the settlement could reach $1.4 billion, according to Steve Berman, the lead plaintiff attorney in the case.

The lawsuits, filed over the last several years, had been seeking class certification.

News of the agreement comes scarcely a week after Toyota agreed to pay a record $17.35-million fine to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration for failing to report a potential floor mat defect in a Lexus SUV. Those come on top of almost $50 million in fines paid by Toyota for other violations related to sudden acceleration since 2010.

The massive settlement does not, however, put Toyota's legal woes to rest. The automaker still faces numerous injury and wrongful death claims around the country, including a group of cases that have been consolidated in federal court in Santa Ana, and other cases awaiting trial in Los Angeles County.

The first of the federal cases, involving a Utah man who was killed in a Camry that slammed into a wall in 2010, is slated for trial in mid-February.

The California cases are set to begin in April, among them a suit involving a 66-year-old Upland woman who was killed after her vehicle allegedly reached 100 miles per hour and slammed into a tree.

Edgar Heiskell III, a West Virginia attorney who has a dozen pending suits against Toyota, said he is preparing to go to trial this summer in a case that involved a Flint, Mich., woman who was killed when her 2005 Camry suddenly accelerated near her home.

"We are proceeding with absolute confidence that we can get our cases heard on the merits and that we expect to prove defects in Toyota's electronic control system," he said.

Toyota spokesman Mike Michels said the settlement would have no bearing on the personal injury cases.

"All carmakers face these kinds of suits," he said. "We'll defend those as we normally would."

The giant automaker's sudden acceleration problems first gained widespread attention after the August 2009 crash of a Lexus ES outside San Diego.

That accident set off a string of recalls, an unprecedented decision to temporarily stop sales of all Toyota vehicles and a string of investigations, including a highly unusual apology by Toyota President Akio Toyoda before a congressional committee. Eventually Toyota recalled more than 10 million vehicles worldwide and has since spent huge sums — estimated at more than $2 billion, not including Wednesday's proposed settlement — to repair both its automobiles and public image.

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10 Things to Do on Dec. 26

Christmas has ended and New Year’s Eve is still a few days away. What’s a person to do during this holiday lull?

1. Complain About Your Christmas Gifts

[More from Mashable: ‘We Are Young’ Performed on Vintage Computer Parts]

All I got for Christmas was some CDs and movies and my little brother got an iPad. Thanks a lot Obama!

— Nick Pagliara (@NickPagliara) December 26, 2012

[More from Mashable: What Christmas Is Like in a Simulated Mars Colony]

All i got for christmas was socks and toothpaste. Thats fucked up

— Inferior (@KowaiiShiAkuma) December 26, 2012

2. Use Your New Label Maker

Image courtesy of Imgur

3. Find Weird Crap Around Your Parents’ House

Hey @shaq at my parents house for Christmas and found this collectible! #longtime fan! twitter.com/GuyCPalmer/sta…

— Guy Palmer (@GuyCPalmer) December 26, 2012

Found this at my parents house- my first mobile phone from 13 years ago. I’m pretty old. twitter.com/ScottOfTheRive…

— Scott (@ScottOfTheRiver) December 23, 2012

A little walk down memory lane on Christmas morning when I found this at my parents’ house.#snaggingitforsure twitter.com/Mandery/status…

— Laura Kroll (@Mandery) December 25, 2012

4. Attempt to Learn How a Kindle Works

My mum just asked me ‘what time doesthe Internet close because I want to buy a book for my kindle?’ #wtf

— Natasha Wedlock (@NatashaWedlock) December 21, 2012

Does anybody know how to work a kindle fire? Mine is stressing me out!

— Emily Fitzhugh (@EmiFitzU) December 26, 2012

but like how does this kindle work?

— a (@its_audrey) December 25, 2012

5. Recreate Old Family Photos

Image courtesy of Reddit, 31Max

Image courtesy of Imgur, ConnorUllmann

6. Try to Figure Out What Boxing Day Is

What is this “Boxing Day” you guys speak of, and do I get to wear silk shorts?

— The Robfather (@thatUPSdude) December 26, 2012

Every year I wonder what Boxing Day is before deciding I’m too lazy to look it up and taking a nap instead.

— joseph birdsong (@josephbirdsong) December 26, 2012

No matter what people tell you, Boxing Day is not the day that Canadians celebrate the birth of Muhammad Ali.

— Mark Campbell (@MrWordsWorth) December 26, 2012

What is Boxing Day and why don’t Americans celebrate it?

— Andrea Cooney (@ACCooney) December 20, 2012

Educate yourself.

7. Put Away the Christmas Throw-Up

Image courtesy of Reddit, xbaahx

8. Return the Stuff You Don’t Want

Image courtesy of Imgur

9. Reuse the Christmas Tree Tinsel and Other Holiday Decorations

Image via Borntobenervous.com

Image courtesy of Flickr, stuartpilbrow

10. Take a Nap

1. Sluggish Pug

Image courtesy of Flickr, chriswaits

Click here to view this gallery.

Thumbnail image courtesy of Flickr, formatc1

This story originally published on Mashable here.

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SPOILER ALERT: Twist awaits US fans of ‘Downton’

NEW YORK (AP) — British fans of “Downton Abbey” are feeling blue after Tuesday’s conclusion of Season 3, even as the U.S. audience eagerly anticipates this third cycle on PBS’ “Masterpiece” beginning Jan. 6.

(ANY “ABBEY” DEVOTEES WHO PREFER NOT TO LEARN WHAT AWAITS THEM ARE URGED TO STOP READING RIGHT NOW.)

___

One of the stars of this wildly popular British costume drama is leaving the series after its third season. Dan Stevens had opted not to continue beyond his initial commitment, the British network ITV confirmed Wednesday.

His character, Matthew Crawley, has been written out with what ITV called an “untimely and tragic death” in the season finale. That episode will air in the U.S. in February.

Michelle Dockery will be returning in Season 4 as Matthew’s soon-to-be widow, Lady Mary.

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Creating the Ultimate Housework Workout

Robert Wright for The New York Times

Chris Ely, an English butler, and Carol Johnson, a fitness instructor at Crunch NYC, perfecting a houseworkout.

CAN housework help you live longer? A New York Times blog post by Gretchen Reynolds last month cited research linking vigorous activity, including housework, and longevity. The study, which tracked the death rates of British civil servants, was the latest in a flurry of scientific reports crediting domestic chores with health benefits like a lowered risk for breast and colon cancers. In one piquant study published in 2009, researchers found that couples who spent more hours on housework had sex more frequently (with each other) though presumably not while vacuuming. (The report did not specify.)

Intrigued by science that merged the efforts of a Martha with the results of an Arnold (a buffer buffer?), this reporter challenged a household expert and a fitness authority to create the ultimate housework workout — a houseworkout — in her East Village apartment. Perhaps she could add a few years to her own life while learning some fancy new moves for her Swiffer. Christopher Ely, once a footman at Buckingham Palace, and Brooke Astor’s longtime butler, was appointed cleaner-in-chief. Mr. Ely is a man who approaches what the professionals call household management with the range and depth of an Oxford don. Although he is working on his memoirs (he described his book as a room-by-room primer with anecdotes from his years in service), he was happy enough to put his writing aside for an afternoon. His collaborator was Carol Johnson, a dancer and fitness instructor who develops classes at Crunch NYC, including those based on Broadway musicals like “Legally Blonde” and “Rock of Ages.”

Mr. Ely arrived first, beautifully dressed in dark gray wool pants, a black suit coat and a crisp white shirt with silver cuff links. He cleans house in a white shirt? “I know how to clean it,” he countered, meaning the shirt. When Ms. Johnson appeared (in black spandex and a ruffly white chiffon blouse, which she switched out for a Crunch T-shirt), theory, method and materials were discussed.

“If you’re dreading the laundry,” Ms. Johnson said, “why not create a space where it’s actually fun to do by putting on some music?” If fitness is defined by cardio health, she added, it will be a challenge to create housework that leaves you slightly out of breath. “I’m thinking interval training,” she said. As it happens, one trend in exercise has been workouts that are inspired by real-world chores, or what Rob Morea, a high-end Manhattan trainer, described the other day as “mimicking hard labor activities.” In his NoHo studio, Mr. Morea has clients simulate the actions of construction workers hefting cement bags over their shoulders (Mr. Morea uses sand bags) or pushing a wheelbarrow or chopping wood.

Mr. Ely averred that service — extreme housekeeping — is physically demanding, with sore feet and bad knees the least of its debilitating byproducts. Mr. Ely still suffers from an injury he incurred while carrying a poodle to its mistress over icy front steps in Washington When the inevitable occurred, and Mr. Ely wiped out, he threw the dog to his employer before falling hard on his backside. And the right equipment matters: After two weeks’ employ in an Upper East Side penthouse, he was handed a pair of Reeboks by his new boss, the better to withstand the apartment’s wall-to-wall granite floors. (For cleaning, Mr. Ely wears slippers, deck shoes or socks.)

Mr. Ely, whose talents and expertise are wide-ranging (he can stock a wine cellar, do the flowers, set a silver service, iron like a maestro and clean gutters, as he did once or twice at Holly Hill, Mrs. Astor’s Westchester estate), is a minimalist when it comes to materials. He favors any simple dish detergent as a multipurpose cleaner, along with a little vinegar, for glass, and not much else. “Dish detergent is designed for cutting grease; there’s nothing better,” he said. He’s anti-ammonia, anti-bleach. He said bleach destroys fabric, particularly anything with elastic in it. “Knickers and bleach are a terrible combination,” he said. “I had a boss who thought he had skin cancer. His entire trunk had turned red and itchy.” It seems his underpants were being washed in bleach. (Collective wince.) “It’s horrible stuff.”

As for tools, he likes a cobweb cleaner — this reporter had bought Oxo’s extendable duster, which has a fluffy orange cotton duster that snaps onto a sort of wand, but Mr. Ely prefers the kind that looks like a round chimney brush. (If you live in a house, he also suggests leaving the cobwebs by the front and back doors, so the spiders can eat any mosquitoes coming or going.) Choose a mop with microfiber fronds (he suggested the O Cedar brand) because it dries quickly and doesn’t smell. And a sturdy vacuum. Also, stacks of microfiber cloths or a terry cloth towel ripped up.

But first, to stretch. Ms. Johnson took hold of this reporter’s Bona floor mop (it’s like a Swiffer, but with a reusable washcloth) and Mr. Ely followed along with an old-fashioned string mop. Though Mr. Ely has a kind of loose-limbed elegance, he is not exactly limber. He grimaced as he parroted Ms. Johnson, who used her mop as Gene Kelly did his umbrella, stretching her arms overhead, one by one, twisting from side to side, sucking in her stomach, rising up on tip toes. (Mr. Ely said his old poodle-hurling injury was kicking in.) Ms. Johnson adjusted his chin — “You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep sticking your neck out,” she warned — and Mr. Ely raised a black-socked foot napped with cat hair and chastised this reporter: “Would you look at that?” (The cat had vanished early on, but his “debris,” as Mr. Ely put it, was still very much in evidence. The reporter hung her head. Did she know that cat spit is toxic? Mr. Ely wondered.)

“We’re warming up the spine,” said Ms. Johnson. “Squeeze your abdominals.”

Mr. Ely looked worried: “I don’t think I have abdominals!”

MR. ELY’S technique is to clean a room from top to bottom. That means he begins with the cobweb cleaner, wafting it along ceiling corners, moldings, soffits and, uh, the top of the fridge (major dust harvest there). His form was pretty, like a serve by Roger Federer, if not exactly aerobic. For Mr. Ely kept stopping to lecture this reporter — on condensation; on the basic principles of heat transfer and why one needs to vacuum the refrigerator coils; on the movement of moist air in a kitchen; on floor care, which involved a long story about a Belgian monastery whose inhabitants never washed the kitchen floor; on how to dust the halogen spot lights (use a cotton cloth, not a microfiber one, and make sure the lights are off, and cool).  “I do rabbit on, don’t I?” he said. Ms. Johnson gamely hustled him along, noting that anytime you raise your arms over your head you can raise your heart rate. “What about a balance exercise?” she cajoled, executing a neat series of leg lifts. “That’s good for the butler’s booty!”

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Three Afghans killed in attack on U.S.-run base

KABUL, Afghanistan -- A suicide car bomber targeting a U.S.-operated base in eastern Afghanistan killed at least three Afghans and injured six others Wednesday, officials said.

There were no immediate reports of casualties among U.S. or North Atlantic Treaty Organization forces.

Afghan officials said the attack happened shortly after 7 a.m. near the entrance to Forward Operating Base Chapman in Khowst, a province near the border of Pakistan that is a hotbed of insurgent activity.

The bomber detonated a minivan packed with explosives when stopped by Afghan security guards at a checkpoint on a road leading to the base, said Provincial Police Chief Abdul Qayoum Baqizoy. One of the guards and two civilian drivers were killed in the blast, which also injured six other people, he said.

“It is important to note that there was not any breach of the (base) perimeter,” said Charlie Stadtlander, a spokesman for the International Security Assistance Force in Afghanistan.

In December 2009, a double-agent-turned-bomber slipped into the base and detonated a suicide vest, killing seven CIA employees in the largest single-day loss for the spy agency in three decades.

The Taliban took responsibility for Wednesday’s attack in a statement posted on its website, claiming that more than 100 “enemies” were killed. The insurgents routinely exaggerate the effects of their attacks.

The statement, attributed to spokesman Zabiullah Mujahid, identified the attacker as a resident of Khowst province named Omar.

“According to our information, every day more than 250 Afghan enemies are waiting to be searched and go into the base to serve the Americans in exchange for dollar salaries,” the statement said. “They are playing with their country, religion and honor.”

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Alexandra.zavis@latimes.com

Hashmat Baktash is a Times special correspondent

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